First Sight by Danielle Steel (2013)


L: 1/10

M: 0/10


Analysis from a fingerprint smudge on a broken window:

Where to begin with the book that almost tore this bookclub apart? I came into this book with little to absolutely zero expectations, and they were accurately rewarded. A pure romance pulp through and through, the bizarrely robotic sentences in these pages seemed like the result of taking every cliche and eye roll one could muster and jamming it into a wood chipper and spreading the remains onto pristine white snow, just like a sidekick who just wouldn’t shut his fucking mouth. It’s often a challenge keeping my mind pinned down to the pages of a book, especially when it’s as dull as this one. It was quite pleasant for a change to not have to worry about drifting away to something else, really anything at all, while processing these pages.
The narrator is the real villain here. I can’t blame these boring people for doing boring things and all being so perfect, even their imperfections are so annoyingly refreshing. The voice following these people around is to blame, repeating the same thing over and over and not even really saying anything at all. It all makes nothing that takes place in this book even seem real, or worth writing down. But yet, Danielle Steel did. Even the title doesn’t make any sense, nothing was accomplished or achieved or realized at first sight. It was second sight, or maybe even third sight that love was found.

danielle-steel-first-sight

FUCK YOU.

I would rather read a book about a house that fell in love with another house, and then burned down the whole neighborhood when it realized true love was a lie that popular authors regurgitate over and over, making every popular top sellers list obsolete and worthless.

Analysis from a podcast junkie with an affection for beards:

In an effort to be transparent and not be judged by the massive shift in our literature choices, I should explain that this book was chosen by my 9-year-old daughter as a gift and to feel included in something that means a great deal to me. She’s a treasure and a mess and I love her. That being said…her book selection SUCKED! Oh dear god, this was a painful read. I rushed through it in two days to get it over and out of my life. I can’t say the same for L, who is now about a month in and counting. For those of you who have seen any Lifetime or Hallmark channel movie ever and loved each one, this book is for you. If you were forced to watch such filth by someone you love and now refuse to speak to them, then feel free to contact me, and we can start a support group. This book is everything that is wrong with the way women romanticize romance. Our leading lady is perfection personified with her only flaw being that she chooses not to love so as not to get hurt. She’s seen far more sadness than most and has risen above to conquer the fashion world where she happens upon a handsome doctor in Paris, of course, and so begins a rocky romance that ends in a pleasant surprise and a happily ever after. I could add in details, but I would hate to ruin every other Danielle Steele book you might pick up on your layover at DFW. Please don’t read this. Please don’t judge us for having read it.

danielle-steel-arms
Danielle Steel

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